She only smiles when she's sleeping
but she can't cry when she's awake
Her pseudo smile is fleeting
Everything about her is fake.

Her walls crumble down
Her windows shatter
Her heart hits the ground
Nothing seems to matter

No one can read her face now
Her soul is hers to know
She'll never know how
To just let him go

The world is at a stand still
She runs and then leaps
Her tears are falling slower than she is
The cliff is so steap

Death won't end her journey
Not with falling this way
downward, now faster
the ground dissipates

solutions

Maybe it doesn't have to be complicated. Flip a coin or just close your eyes and be selfish. Who is going to be there for YOU? Who do you see when the lights are out? Maybe you're already subconsciously being selfish. What if the one door you want to open back up has already shut and locked itself and the doorway you're standing in leads you somewhere that makes you happy but it doesn't lead you to your everything. If you step away this door will shut also and who's to say you'll get back into it and when you step towards the other door who's to say it will unlock and what if you lose both opportunities. So instead you provide self-insurance and remain standing, blocking the second door from shutting and leaving the first door shut and secluded. You worry about neglecting the very territory that you're simply gazing at while a whole new adventure slowly slips. The longer you wait the worse things get and slowly you don't want to choose. You want this to be over with, some one to choose for you but no one's choices make you happy now. Some one will be hurt, yes. It's part of life dear, we've all hurt. You know this all too well. This is what's stopping you then? To put onto some one what you've felt is too much. You and i both know that sooner or later that time will come so think about when it will hurt less. Now...or later? I've been some one's first door. It hurts a lot less earlier on and you'll win back the key to door two, promise. It will just take a little work which we both know you'll do regardless. Good luck my friend.

that laugh that wrinkles your nose it touches my foolish heart

Thanks again, I saw him and i know how blessed I am.